Still I Rise Part Two

     Last week I posted a poem that meant a lot to me.  After reading it, I have realized that it has made me grow because it caused me to reflect and even reflect on things that are happening in my life here in LA.  In the past I have always talked about people hating me for being me and I also talked about me having paparazzi.  To this day I still deal with this if not worse.
     In order for me to continue with this entry I guess I need to explain that I am homeless and I find that there are many that like to down women of transgender experience.  Perhaps this is why I like the poem and I feel I can relate.  I can sit here and make excuses for why people feel the need to tear each other down especially those like me, however I have to admit I will not do that.  All I can do is show them that when it is all said and done, they can't hurt me with the words that come out their mouth because thru their words and hatred I will rise.  I refuse to stay in the same situation for years like some.  I refuse to stay stuck as many do that are homeless in this city and any other because I am afraid to grow.  In fact I push myself to grow. 
     I see many people do on a daily basis but hang around and do nothing for themselves.  I also see those that are so caught up in the drugs that they do nothing but chase the high.  I have to be careful with wanting to feel sorry for them and thinking they are wasting their life.  I can't do that because I have been there.  I use to go to clubs every night and use coke.  You see I am an addict that has not used in eleven years.  My drug of choice was coke.  For many years I used on a daily basis.  Even though I still have urges on occasion, and when I do I take myself to a cocaine anonymous meeting, I can honestly say... Still I Rise.
    One thing I am doing here in Los Angeles is working on myself.  I could get into relationships because so many want to be with me, I know there are many things I want to do for me to be complete and even though a relationship would be nice, I would not feel complete.  I learned with my ex husband that when you rush in a relationship you do not know enough about each other and it is easy to lose focus.  One thing I am working on its getting a place to call my own and get a job so I can enjoy pampering myself on occasion.  I want to be able to say,  I have been through a lot...Still I rise.
     Even though I do this, I will always stay humble and would love to help others if I can.  If anything, I hope this entry will encourage everyone, not just those of transgender experence realize there is always going to be someone that will make you relate to the poem from my previos post.  Remember the poem and when they finish talking there trash, say to yourself these three words...Still I Rise.
Until next time, stay safe and be blessed.